Walk with me for a moment down memory lane. It's Thursday, August 7, 2008. I am eating lunch with Scott at
Pappa's Bar-B-Q in
Dallas and my phone rings. It's Todd from my ECAP training. He informs me that there is a position open at Richardson High School and that I need to get in touch with them to see if I can get an interview. I promptly call Rob and the interview is all set up for Friday afternoon. Interview goes great. The two weeks notice at Apple goes in. HR tells me on Monday that I'm not quite qualified and that I will not be considered for the position. A bit of confusion, but no hard feelings.
Here we are a month later and I just finished up my first day of substitute teaching in Carrollton. A month later and I had no work to do. It was a bittersweet end to what I would like to discuss in the next few paragraphs. In
Genesis 3:17-19 God places the curse on Adam. The curse that is the end to which all men strive: cultivation. During my month of unemployment, I learned a lot about myself, what it means to follow Christ, and what it really means to be a man that takes his salvation seriously. God has definitely used the time to grow me closer to being the man that I want to become. I'm not there yet. There is still a lot of growth, yet. To bring you into my head a little bit, here's how it went down. Week one was great. I got to do all of the things that I wanted to do for a long time, but never had the free time to do so. I redid the blog and moved to MT4. I made a photoblog which is yet to be released. I got tons of crap done around the house. I worked on my golf swing. I was the
GTD man to the max. Week two arrives. I have nothing to do but think. I think and think and think until finally my sinful heart comes to mind. Crap. There's a lot of stuff in there. What the heck do I do with all of that sin? It's disgusting. Wait, repulsive. I fought hard and struggled. In the end, Christ broke through for me and delivered me from the wickedness that is my nature. Week three rolls around and I am learning more about what the Lord wants my life to look like. Week four comes and I am getting better at golf and have a firm grasp on what Jesus wants to do with my life. I still haven't arrived. He is wanting to do more with my life than I ever wanted to do with it. He wants my life to be Christ exalting, God glorifying, and joyful. None of these things has seemed to happen in the past three years that I have been a Christian. I know that it has, just not as pronounced as it has now. It must that progressive sanctification thing. During the dark couple of weeks and the glorious end to my unemployment, Christ was working his good pleasure for my joy.
What happened to horticulture? I'm glad you asked. For the past three years I have always been chasing something, cultivating and building. Achieving. Whether it be a degree from Texas Tech, a job, purpose in life, a girl, or money, my pursuit in life has been the next life stage. After a gracious but firm reminder, my cultivation needs to be my relationship with Christ. If I cannot pursue him now, what makes me think that I can do when all of these things are in my life? Why not figure it out now, so that when I do have a job, I'm married, I'm financially stable, it will bring me that much more joy? The primary role of a man is to cultivate. When I had nothing else to cultivate, I turned to the Lord and he was came through on his promise to wait while I was working it out. It took me a lifetime to find him, a month to really chase him, but the joy I take in my salvation and the depth and beauty in life that I see when I look at it through the Gospel lens carries me into the new mercies he has for me every morning.
